Object Writing, Prose & Poetry Forum

July 21, 2018, 09:43:29 PM
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This week's words;

Sunday - Instructions

Monday- Motorcycle

Tuesday- Wildflower

Wednesday- Asparagus

Thursday- Stopwatch

Friday - Confetti

Saturday-Homesick



Word of the Day
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1  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / Re: Diary on: July 20, 2018, 04:05:18 PM
yes! very interesting indeed
2  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / Re: Altar on: July 18, 2018, 05:15:46 AM
this is haunting. powerful. great writing
3  Prose, Poetry, Music & Lyrics / Prose & Poetry / Re: One of my songs: Rooftop in the Rain on: July 13, 2018, 09:36:46 AM
cool.  I like the numbers thing you did.
4  Prose, Poetry, Music & Lyrics / Prose & Poetry / Re: Lyrics, "The Joke" on: July 13, 2018, 09:35:29 AM
Seemed a little long, but I have no attention span.

"Muted groans and microphones
The band gets applause & the comic stones
You are grinning
While the crowd is thinning
The whiskey's close and the future's far
My dreams in a parasitic bar"

I really liked this part, but I agree with M about the word "parasitic"

I might have changed "applause" to cheers, but that was just my gut instinct.  I like your stuff. I'd like to hear this one set to music.
5  Prose, Poetry, Music & Lyrics / Prose & Poetry / Re: Homeless on: July 13, 2018, 09:29:22 AM
nice poem. I had to re-read the last stanza. My mind couldn't figure out who the character was. Those are helpful comments. Kudos to both of you!
6  Prose, Poetry, Music & Lyrics / Prose & Poetry / Re: It's All In Your Head (please leave comments!!!) on: July 13, 2018, 09:25:58 AM
not bad  Smiley good imagery and concept.  some parts were a little wordy or unnecessary in my opinion (I would have edited the "geyser" part. But I think I got the overall point and feeling. Good job  Smiley
7  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / Re: Mascara on: July 13, 2018, 09:16:02 AM
clever  Wink
8  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / Re: Spy on: July 12, 2018, 06:04:52 AM
I dig  Smiley
9  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / Re: Spy on: July 12, 2018, 06:03:46 AM
I second that.
10  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / spy on: July 12, 2018, 06:02:12 AM
In certain rooms of this old two story house, it's blistering hot. In other rooms, it's freezing cold. He likes to sleep downstairs in his grandfather's office because there are at least two window units running at full blast. One of the 10 or so people who live here like it cold at night. He wakes up and there are icicles formed in the inside of his nose. The room is empty. He steps onto the cold, wooden floor. It’s quiet except for the hum of the a/c units. It’s probably 7 or 10 o’clock in the morning. He wanders out of that room and into the hallway.  There he can see across the hall into the living room. Cattycorner into the dining room and kitchen and to the left the front door.  The sun is coming through the window in the front door.  No one in this part of the house.  He can smell the lingering of cigarette smoke in the dining room. Cooling coffee and the remnants of breakfast cooked not long ago.
Above him, the staircase leads to the secret lives of his family. His young aunts and uncles. His mother's siblings, their friends, and his grandmother.
He walks up the creaking staircase quietly. He knows if there is a hungover aunt or uncle up there, they will be annoyed at him sneaking around. If grandma has worked the night shift at the police department, she will be angry if he wakes her up.  He nervously and excitedly walks up the staircase, trying to make no sound.
Once upstairs he can see doors on his left and straight ahead. There is a window to his right that looks out into the front yard. He can see the big oak tree with a hole in it. So many toys lost in that hole.  He slowly turns the knob to the first door.  Still no sound.  Only the hum of air conditioner window units downstairs.  Upstairs is completely silent.  He looks in to see a sleeping aunt behind door number one.  She’s all tangled up in the covers and snoring gently.  She doesn’t wake up. There will be no rustling through her stuff today. She makes a small moan and turns over in bed but doesn’t wake up. He shuts the door as quietly as possible. This is one bored, lonely kid. He tries the next room.  Boom. It is empty. this is another aunt’s room.  Bingo. He must be
11  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / tulips on: July 10, 2018, 06:04:46 AM
She handed me a clear, glass vase.  Thicker at the bottom and with a flared opening at the top. Kind of like an hourglass. It had little decorative nubs on the outside. Inside held an array of white flowers. “It’s for your first show. They’re tulips.” “Oh, thank you so much,” I replied as I smelled them. I have no idea what the difference between a tulip and a toucan is. I don’t know flora or fauna. I’ve smoked for so many years that my sense of smell is non-existent. But the white roses are gorgeous. And the gift is thoughtful. Kim, on the other hand, didn’t seem so thoughtful. She’s about 45, blonde. Very funny and energetic on stage. But has a bad case of resting-bitch-personality. I mean face. She tries to help everyone in the show, but it comes off as bossy and mean. She even pulled me aside and whispered that sometimes when she’s being a bitch it comes off as ‘bitchy’ and not to take it personally. Ok, so maybe that’s not exactly what she said, but I’m going deaf and it’s hard to hear in that hot, dark theater. Man, that place is old.  Falling apart even. Kim means well. I believe. She’s a funny and talented actress. True to her craft. Those white carnations she gave me were a thoughtful gift. Kim could stand to lose some weight though. Maybe that’s why she’s dating online. Community theater is full of strangers and strangeness. If there’s a next time, I’ll be prepared for that. Thanks for the criticism and the sweet-smelling carnations, Kim. I hope you fall in love and die! Please forget to write!
12  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / Re: Donut on: July 09, 2018, 11:01:57 AM
nice!
13  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / donut on: July 09, 2018, 05:22:34 AM
He walks into the back room of the church. There is an unopened box of Krispy Kreme, chocolate covered donuts sitting in a chair. The worship band muddles around waiting for their concert to begin. Someone sets this box down on a padded chair. He muses, “oh, someone brought me donuts. What are ya’ll going to eat?” the joke is lost on anyone listening. “don’t touch those.” He is nervous and feels a little out of place. “Church doesn’t seem quite right” This is so business-like.  The fresh paint, the brand-new Mac. Someone is clicking names into a computer program that spits out little nametags. He goes to type in his name and get his little peel off sticky nametag. “I’ve already signed you in,” someone says. Ok. Whatever. This new church isn’t like the movies.  There is a daycare, a coffee shop, speakers and pop music pumping out of every corner.  Brand new carpet. Everyone is dressed to the nines in their hippest, sexiest outfits. I don’t know. Maybe the modern church isn’t so bad. Branding, branding, branding. Everywhere. He sees a new t-shirt design.  “I want that”. There are flat-screen TV’s on every wall showing the countdown to the beginning of service.  A slight nervousness and a bit of arrogance well up inside.  He’s about to hit the stage with the spotlights, and fog machines, and video screens, and backing tracks. loud thunderous rock music that sounds like U2 and Coldplay.  The modern church is surely different. He feels a bit claustrophobic at all the people and smiles and movement. He wonders if
14  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / New Orleans on: July 08, 2018, 12:12:48 PM
It’s rectangular it’s yellow with red lettering. It’s a sign that reads “ADULT VIDEO” and it tells me I’m there. It’s louder than a second line parade and smellier than stale vomit. It’s the road sign that tells me I’m in one of the greatest and worst cities in America. I must’ve have been 18 and it must have been the middle of the year-early June. I had heard stories, about friends going and getting drunk in bars because they didn’t ID anyone. But it didn’t matter. We were all recently graduated, young and better looking than we realized and we all had handfuls of crisp graduation dollars. It was the first time I had ever been away from home. Old enough to go out and party like an adult. I realized much later that adults can’t party that way.  We were babies.  We checked into our hotel room. Cheap, old, another stale smelling box with the charm of any 150-year-old French building. This is a big city.  Big as in “condensed”.  Tall buildings everywhere, people people people.  Moving, shaking, touring.  So many friends there. It was like a high school reunion only a week after high school.  Walking down Bourbon St. we’d get a daiquiri with an extra shot of 151 “Jet Fuel”. Such fun names. Everything colorful, everything fruity.  Hurricanes, fruit punch, Hand grenades. so much color and fruitiness you don’t taste or even smell the alcohol.  So you don’t realize how drunk you’re getting.  The shy me turned into the outgoing me.  Desperately seeking Susan…or anyone who would talk to me.  My insides buzzing, I walked down that nasty carnival street like I owned it.  It almost sounds like a trumpet blast the second you hit bourbon street.  The girls are all dressed so pretty.  The bartenders love you and seduce you.  Leather, lace, dresses, heels, clink clink drink drink.
15  ObjectWriting / Object Writing Word Of The Day / Re: Doctor on: July 08, 2018, 12:01:22 PM
This is my first time on this site. I enjoyed that a lot. Smiley
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