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Author Topic: Lyrics, "The Joke"  (Read 1058 times)
berkley84
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« on: September 17, 2014, 05:18:18 AM »

Here's a song I've been working on for a while.  What do y'all think?

"The Joke"

Time will take its toll
Then traffic jams might choke the road
When you are whisperin'
I am barely listenin'
To old CDs, to songs we sing
Without knowing what the lyrics mean
You are droning
On a Monday Morning

Oh how I tried to make it past
Lousy metaphors and laughs
They came so easy
Now I'm lost completely
You try to make the moments last
While your life goes walking past
It seems so weary
And its eyes ignore me

And the shadows of the years I have left go wandering meekly
And the embers of the laughter I spent flicker and fade
And the punchline's fist comes to hit me square in the face

Well it's funny when you realize life is silly
When you say so, no one takes you seriously
You're a clown and when you frown no one gets the comedy
You're a poet though you know it's not the best way to speak clearly

Let it go, let it go go go...

Muted groans and microphones
The band gets applause & the comic stones
You are grinning
While the crowd is thinning
The whiskey's close and the future's far
My dreams in a parasitic bar
You are leavin'
On a Friday evening

Take pride in nothin' when you could
A walk of shame would do some good
To sink your ego
Wherever we go
I had the set up written years ago
I know a load of jokes
That kill completely
Though the frenzy's fleeting

There's a puncture in the bag and the minutes leak like an oil well
And the bones of the seconds I had shift in their grave
And the punchline's knuckles crack...and I'm on my way

Well it's funny when you realize life is silly
When you say so, no one takes you seriously
You're a clown and when you frown no one gets the comedy
You're a poet though you know it's not the best way to speak clearly

Oh no
Let it go, let it go go go
Like a balloon your bitter hand can't bear to hold
Let it go, let it go go go
Like the bluff that blew up brimming to my fold
Let it go, let it go go go
Heal the bruises and the blisters in my soul
Let it go, let it go go go
To the ruins that lay a-burying my home
Let it go.

All the delusions and resentment that I held
All the pain that I inflicted on myself
I'll let it go.

Well it's funny when you realize life is pithy and pathetic
When you say so you know you'll soon regret it
You're a joke and when you spoke there were echos of tragedy
Good with words but that's the worst I've heard
Someone try to say “Goodbye”
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francis
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« Reply #1 on: December 02, 2016, 11:22:02 AM »

Hi berkley84,

I think you have some really good lines in here, I like the first verse - it really sets up the mood, and there also some other good line such as:

the punchline's fist comes to hit me square in the face

The whisky's close and the future's far
My dreams in a parasitic bar - I'm not very fond of the word parasitic, it seems a bit too technical - what about my dreams are not moving from the bar?


I'm just wondering what is this poem/song about? what do you want to say with it? reading through it a couple times, I get different messages: 'life is too short, live it more like a joke - or my life is a joke who am I kidding? or I make a living by telling jokes, but it's hard a life for me, and at the end of the day the only thing I have left is my jokes - kinda like a love/hate relationship.

I think it really has a strong potential and can go wherever you think feels right to you.

All the best in your writing

M
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