Object Writing, Prose & Poetry Forum

September 20, 2019, 06:39:48 PM
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This week's words;

Sunday - Instructions

Monday- Motorcycle

Tuesday- Wildflower

Wednesday- Asparagus

Thursday- Stopwatch

Friday - Confetti

Saturday-Homesick



Word of the Day
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Author Topic: Umbrella  (Read 56 times)
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MRL
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« on: September 11, 2019, 07:51:37 AM »


I am king in my castle of bright coloured nylon and metal rhythmic patterns. The inside of my umbrella tent is like in the middle of a dandelion that is ripe to be blown out. I squeeze the thick, healthy grass in our backyard in my 10-year-old fist, while my chin rests on my knees.

I want to stay here forever, looking at the colour spectrum that the different sorts of umbrella’s and the sun make together, listening to the sound of happy chicken conversations in the background. My mother calls, once, twice. The sound of her trouser legs touching each other is getting closer. "Merel, why don't you respond?" "Oh, just.", I say. 

I imagine how I can ascend with the umbrella tent folding around me like a big ball, carried on the wind on a journey to a magical land, where I cannot hear my mother calling.
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hazelynut
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« Reply #1 on: September 12, 2019, 02:55:51 AM »

I really enjoyed this. You bring the reader somewhere, and I feel the sensory experience. I too have memories of being a child, tearing up the grass... and the chin on the knees brings me into the moment. Then there's the hint of a story, of being called by the mother but wanting to be somewhere that you cannot hear the mother calling. There's a lot here in not many words!
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MRL
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« Reply #2 on: September 12, 2019, 06:01:36 AM »

Thank you so much! That's really nice to hear
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