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Author Topic: Nerves  (Read 19345 times)
JNWagner
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« on: October 31, 2012, 07:48:16 AM »

Sitting on the couch, my palms sweat, my foot bounces uncontrollably, a bead of sweat on my forehead. The sound of the opening band bass booms over and over again through the walls. I take a sip from the can of Coke supplied in the fridge, I prefer Pepsi, but it helps. I will switch to warm water in a few minutes then start my vocal warm ups along with my guitar warm up. BOOM BOOM BOOM, they are doing good, will I? Bouncing leg, never stopping. Wash my hands…. Again.  Cotton mouth.  Pace the floor, do some pushups. Still 2 hours to go? My nerves are in hyper drive. What if I freeze? What if I start good but make a major mistake and freeze. My fingers just want to stay in a fist, maybe I should’ve been a fighter. I know they came to see the band but I wasn’t with them last time, what if the fans hate me? Do I fit in with this band? The band seems to think so. But they are all so good and have been doing this for decades each of them. This is my first show. Maybe they’re just telling me I am doing good so I don’t bring them all down, trying to strengthen the weak link. The smell of the couch from so many people sitting in it for so many years permeates my brain. How many great guitarists have sat here? Will I let them down? Can I back out now? They can do fine without me, they are that good. They have enough songs they can fill my small part. Should I text them now? Is it too late? If I wait it will surely be too late. My hands shake so much I can hardly hold the phone. Bouncing foot. I try to lean back in the couch but just sink down to the wood. I’m covered in soft, dirty stained material with deep soft foam all around, sitting on a wood frame, NICE. I can hear the old dirty sticker covered fridge running even with the bass booming outside. Hearing people outside, running back and forth, I feel unworthy of this, I should be in the audience like last year
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« Reply #1 on: November 04, 2012, 11:35:12 AM »

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